100 Reasons I Retired and What's Happening Now. #98 Called to Care

Psalm 91 for Spousal Caregivers

My daughter and I sat in the family room outside the trauma ward, waiting out the long hours of my husband’s surgery following the car accident. Ron’s father and brother paced the floor, while his mother sat quietly, looking out the window at the dark parking lot. Eventually, two deacons from church, my best friend Chris, and our minister arrived and joined in the waiting.

The companionship and prayers of others helped. But in the many years that followed that first surgery, I often found myself alone or with just my daughter as we sat in other family rooms in other hospitals, waiting.

For an answer.

For relief.

For an end.

Sometimes I would meet other women who had been thrust into the role of spousal caregiver and I would marvel at the ability we had to keep on moving ahead. I would offer what prayers and comfort I could, frustrated that I couldn’t do more.

I could write a book, I thought after one particularly long surgery. I could let women know that they are not alone. That we are many. That God is always present.

The desire became Reason 98 on the list of reasons I decided to retire.

In May of 2024, I joined a workshop from Flourish Writers called Light the Way, determined to write a Bible study for those women I met in waiting rooms and hospital corridors. In November, I finished the first draft of the book. 107 pages, written to a woman sitting alone in a hospital waiting room, needing comfort as she begins the tremendous journey of caring for an ill spouse.

Like all first drafts, it is messy and sometimes disorganized and needs editing and revisions. My prayer is that other women such as me will find comfort and companionship in what is often a long and lonely journey.

I’d appreciate your prayers and support as I continue the work!

Have you ever taken care of an ill spouse or know someone who has? What is one thing you would have liked to know ahead of time?