I Shall be Glad

Journey of the Magi

Unlike many seasonal poems, Eliot ends his on what appears to be a somber note: looking for another death. The narrator, one of the Magi, has returned to his opulent palace and finds himself discontent with the trappings of his former life.

He has seen the true God. Nothing else can satisfy him. Now, he awaits the Kingdom.

And what of us? Unlike the Magi, who had only scant knowledge of what they sought, we approach the Manger of Jesus fully aware of the cost: death to our old selves and ways of life, and the birth of a new life in Jesus.

For my autistic adult son, Allen, death is a tricky concept. If Jesus gives eternal life, then how can his father be truly dead? The eight months Allen and I spent physically searching for his father in places Allen thought he might be brought me closer to the grief process of a neuro-divergent. I was blessed to share the journey with him. The journey of grief is one we all must walk.

I do not fear death, nor do I yearn for it. God has shown me there are many other things I need to do, especially to use my gift of writing for the Kingdom. One day, though, I know I will see my beloved again.

Therein lies my comfort.

REFLECTION:

My journey as a spousal caregiver was long and lonely but strengthened my dependence on God. The grief journey Allen and I shared after Ron died gave me a greater understanding of the different ways we grieve and the realization that God honors them all. The writing of Allen’s experiences has fueled my desire for a writing ministry.

How have you been changed by your journey?